THE CYCLE OF VIOLENCE

  • Denial works in each stage to keep the cycle going
  • The cycle does not end and will continue
  • The abuse will get more frequent and more serious as time goes on
cycle of violence image

Tension Building Phase

A victim uses appeasement and patience as coping strategies. As time progresses, the tension increases and these coping techniques are less successful. Incidents including verbal assaults become more frequent. Victims often say in this stage, they feel like they are walking on egg shells.

Blow-up Phase

A victim may attempt to protect themselves and their children, but victims often don't resist out of fear. This phase often includes physical violence to the victim.

Honeymoon Phase

This in when an abuser apologizes and offers gifts; ie: flowers, candy, etc. Victims often feel obligated to forgive the batterer. They accept the promises offered by their batterer, about never doing it again and/or getting help etc. Often times the victim will accept total responsibility for the abuse. They just want to believe more than anything the violence will not reoccur.

Remember no one asks to be abused and domestic violence is never the fault of the victim.