REMEMBER, LEAVING YOUR ABUSER CAN BE A DANGEROUS TIME

Safety When Preparing to Leave

  • Open a savings account in your own name to establish or increase your independence. Ensure that your statement is sent to a safe address
  • Get your own post office box, using a safe permanent address
  • If you have pets, make arrangements for them to be cared for in a safe place
  • Gather the items on this checklist and have them stored at a friend or family member's house
  • Determine who would be able to let you stay with them or to lend you money
  • Keep the shelter/hotline numbers and some change or a calling card with you at all times. Consider getting a cell phone if possible
  • Review your safety plan as often as possible in order to plan the safest way to leave your abuser
  • If you plan to use a computer to learn more about leaving, please ask someone knowledgeable about the dangers that may be associated with doing so
  • Tell your children's school, day care, etc., who has your permission to pick up the children
  • Never tell your abuser where you live. Tell your children to do the same
  • Discuss a safety plan with your children. Inform them where to go and what to do if the abuser shows up
  • Inform your neighbors, landlord, neighborhood watch program, and anyone else who you feel may be helpful, that your abuser does not live with you and that if they see him they should call the police
  • Keep a journal. This journal can also be used to document any Protective Order violations, specific incidents of abuse and any other important information you want to record. Record all contact with the batterer. Always keep this journal away from your abuser. You may want to keep it at your office or at a friend or family member's house. Save all messages/recordings from batterer

Information provided by UDVC

Remember no one asks to be abused and domestic violence is never the fault of the victim.